News FERRARI LUCE: €550,000, 1,050 HP, DESIGNED BY JONY IVE — MONTEZEMOLO COLLAPSES ON SIGHT, CARRIED OUT ON A STRETCHER BY FOUR PIT STOP ENGINEERS
Breaking BJ NATO: US CUTS MILITARY SUPPORT TO EUROPE — EUROPE SAYS “OH GOD” AND GOES BACK TO ARGUING ABOUT THE BUDGET
Breaking BJ US SUSPENDS ARMS SALE TO TAIWAN: “IT’S NOT THAT WE DON’T LOVE YOU, IT’S JUST THAT IRAN NEEDS US RIGHT NOW”
Breaking BJ GAZA FLOTILLA: FRANCE DEMANDS SANCTIONS — EUROPE SCHEDULES A MEETING TO DISCUSS WHETHER TO SCHEDULE A MEETING
Geopolitica Emotivamente Distrutta STRAIT OF HORMUZ: TRUMP THREATENS OMAN WITH “BLOWING UP” — THE SULTAN CHECKS UNDER HIS ARMCHAIR FOR A MINE AND GOOGLES WHETHER HIS INSURANCE IS STILL VALID
Satire GLOBAL EXPERTS URGE CALM AFTER ANOTHER WEEK OF EVENTS THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN UNTHINKABLE LAST YEAR
Brothcast Journal Satire Geopolitics Iran United States U.S. BOMBS IRAN DURING PEACE TALKS, CLARIFIES THAT “NEGOTIATING” DOESN’T MEAN “STOPPING”
Breaking BJ New York Times Publisher Urges American Media: “Do Not Bow to Trump” — Statement Issued From Behind a Paywall
Geopolitica Emotivamente Distrutta Russia Launches 600 Drones and 90 Missiles at Kyiv, Including One Capable of Carrying Nuclear Warheads — “For Atmosphere”
Economia Esausta FTSE MIB Approaches 50,000 Points — Wall Street Closed Because Americans Are Grilling
Geopolitica Emotivamente Distrutta "EPIC FURY": First Military Operation in History With an Honest Name